


Brace For Impact

by henclair



Series: Brace For Impact [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Roller Coaster, F/F, M/M, Unresolved Emotional Tension, peggy is mentioned like once
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-06
Updated: 2017-06-06
Packaged: 2018-11-09 23:50:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11115486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/henclair/pseuds/henclair
Summary: Alexander was in a nightmare. A never ending roller coaster leading to doom.





	Brace For Impact

Alexander was in a nightmare. A never ending roller coaster leading to doom.

But it was real, it was daytime, but it was torture.

How did it come to this? Alexander was having a good year, he had a girlfriend, sweet Eliza. He had a large group of friends, including Eliza’s sisters. He had a great best friend, and a father figure. He was ahead in his classes and had an apartment and a job. The American Dream...

So why did he find himself here? In his living room of his apartment, surrounded by three girls whom he loved, with his best friend whom he loves in the next room. Normally this would be great, but not in these situations. Because if you didn’t look closely you wouldn’t see the tear tracks on Eliza’s cheeks, the bruises and pale pallid skin on Maria, the white clenched fists of Angelica. And if you didn’t listen you wouldn’t hear John’s sobbing. You wouldn’t see the mess.

It all started this afternoon, Alexander mused. He had been going out on a lunch date with Eliza, on a warm, windy, New York day. They were sharing a salad and a couple of sandwiches on the grassy hill hear Alex’s apartment. Eliza was laughing at a joke Alexander had told and all was perfect.

It all went downhill from there.

Right as they were packing up, a familiar brunette ran up to them, Eliza stiffened. It was Maria, she and Alex had been dating while Alex and Eliza were dating for the first few months, actually 12 months, a year Alex reminded himself. Eliza had forgiven him but not her. Maria bounded up to them and gave Alex a huge hug and Eliza a small handshake.

“Alex! I finally broke up with James,” her abusive ex, “and I’m back in New York for now! How’ve you been?” Alex smiled and patted a space next to him on the grass and sat down. “I mean I know we’ve been texting, but you can only get so much information.” She said. Eliza raised her eyebrows at Alex, who felt a small little bit of grief crawling up his throat.

They all chatted tensely for a couple of minutes before Eliza excused herself, claiming Peggy needed to see her. Alex watched her go sadly, and blew her a kiss before turning to Maria again.

Maria smiled and Alex remembered why he dated her. She was stunning.

Alex kissed her.

But nothing ever goes right, and who had shown up them, but Eliza’s protective older sibling Angelica. Who coincedently Alexander had a fling with for many on and off months. Alex knew he had made a mistake in that moment.

“Alexander?” She asked, her voice mean. Maria pulled away, hurt flashing on her face. She looked like a puppy who had been kicked. Angelica pulled Maria up carefully and glared at Alexander coldly. “You really should keep your hands to yourself, Alexander, someone could see you.” 

Angelica flipped him off and lead Maria away.

The day couldn’t get any worse, Alexander thought.

But it could and it did.

Alex went to his apartment and collapsed on his couch, regret flashing through his mind, he pictured a million scenarios, all ending with him alone. A crash resounded throughout the apartment as John burst through the door.

“WHAT THE FUCK ALEXANDER?” John cried, pointing an accusatory finger at the man in question. Alex whimpered a bit and curled up. “I mean really! What would you do that for?” John seethed. “You had it good! Eliza forgave you, and you had a chance to make everything better with Maria and Angelica was going to treat you and Eliza to a special dinner tonight!” John sat on the couch next to him and glared at Alex.

“So why the fuck did you go and kiss Maria.” John asked.

“I just, spur of the moment. I was lost in her eyes, she really is beautiful.” Alex said weakly. John pinched the bridge of his nose and breathed slowly. 

“Spur of the moment, like the months with Angelica. The flirting and drunken kisses you initiated with me. Like when you dated Maria and Eliza for months, without either knowing and claimed that you were going to break it off eventually.” John looked on the verge of tears. 

“You're hurting everyone around you Alexander! You’re ruining your own life and ours. Do you know how many people are in love with you because of your inability to keep your hands to yourself?” John’s voice cracked and tears were flowing freely now. “I love you Alexander. You don’t love me however. You love Eliza, you are attracted to Maria, and you idolize Angelica. You care for me. Or at least that’s what I see.” John was speaking in a whisper now. 

“I hope this all resolves better for others than you.” John stood up and walked towards his room.

As an afterthought he added, “I hope that you burn.”

After that it just got horrible. Angelica arrived with a devastated Eliza, who it turns out had witnessed it, she had seen Angelica and followed her to ask her a question. Maria came over, her lips bruised and face ghostly white. Lafayette and Hercules had come over, faces grim. Word got out.

“Lafayette, Herc, thank god someone who can help me with what I’m going through.” Lafayette glared at him, the most hateful look he had ever received from the frenchman. Hercules’ booming voice was cracked as he said, “We’re not here for you.” They left Alex and went to comfort John, sending a last withering glance Alex’s way.

He was alone.

He would end up loveless.

And it was all his fault.

The sound of Angelica’s cold calculating voice ripped through Alexander’s flashback, “So who is it Alexander?” She hissed his name out as if it pained her. Alex stared at her, in confusion, had he missed something.

Eliza’s voice was heartless as she addressed the questions in his mind, “We want to know who you love. You can’t just have us all.” Alex felt his heart wrench and he felt sick. Looking around the room he saw love, love in many of its purest forms.

Angelica, smart, beautiful, calculating, she oozed authority, pink roses and delicate lace, but hiding thorns and poison. Angelica was the queen. And god save anyone who disrespected the queen.

Eliza, caring, heartfelt, loving, she was lazy mornings and sugar, she had an air of happiness and purity. Eliza was a princess, kind and caring to a fault.

Maria, who was all the right shapes, dark reds and pinks, longing and miles of hair. Maria was a enchantress, and no one could help you if you fell under her spell.

And John, sunrises, colors, fireworks, passion, quiet moments, revolutions, freckles like stars, John knew what he wanted and he would get it. He was the fire that fueled passion, coffee in the mornings, vodka at night, friendship and kinship, a sense of belonging and wanting. A masterpiece you could touch. John was ethereal.

Alexander elicited a small gasp.

Maria spoke up, “Have you come to a conclusion?” Maria asked hesitantly. Alex took a deep breath and hoped that the day would only get better.

“I love…” Alex trailed off, he couldn’t get it out. It was too new. It was too powerful, he realized he could make or break these people with one name.

A deep breath.

He closed his eyes.

He spoke.

“I am in love with John Laurens.”

3

2

1

 

Brace for impact.

**Author's Note:**

> yikes im so sorry, so so sorry, the followup is there, please go read it  
> tumblr come hmu and cry with me: @floralconversesations and @writinginmysparetime  
> kudos, comments all welcome!


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